


I'm sorry... I'm just so scared (lamp)

by JJ2003



Series: My Soulmate Au [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Issues, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has PTSD, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Panic Attacks, Anxious Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, M/M, Morality | Patton Sanders Has Feelings, Morality | Patton Sanders Has mental disorder, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:08:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 12,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27548845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJ2003/pseuds/JJ2003
Summary: Virgil had never been interested in his soulmates, he had hated the idea of ever righting to them in the past, but once he met them he couldn't help but never want to leave there side.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton, Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton, Logic | Logan Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: My Soulmate Au [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2020423
Comments: 5
Kudos: 73





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> this is a re-write of another book, it will be updated randomly unless something else is said.

"Mum, look" the small boy runs up to his mother pulling at her lose pant leg trying to gain her attention. The woman looks down at the boy "what is it Virgil?" she asked smiling and healing down to her son's hight "look, there's writing on my arm!" he said pulling his leave up to reveal a small note in light blue writing that looked quite scruffy "hi! I'm Patton" was what it read. his mother's skin turned white, well more white then it already was. The woman took her sons arm and made him look her in the eyes "don't reply to that" he said "soulmates can only bring you harm" she pointed o the righting "why do you think I never respond to my writing!" the boy pulls back and looks at his arm "b-but they ar-" his mother interrupted him "YOU ARE TO NOT WRITE BACK! DO I MAKE MY SELF CLEAR?" she grabbed his chin roughly making him look at her, Virgil nodded softly "y-yes mum" he said feeling tears build in his eyes "don't even look at them Virgil" she said before turning back to what she was doing. Virgil looked at her for a few seconds before running off to his room shutting the door and sliding down the inside of it looking at the message on his arm. he started to cry quite heavily...

He wouldn't find out why his parents hated soulmates for years.

By the time he was 15, he was conditioned to hate his soulmates after hearing the stories of his mother's soulmate and being beaten black and blue for looking and he never dared look at them again. Too scared that his soulmates would be like that man he met many years ago.

** __________ **

"Hi! I'm Patton" turned up on Romans arm. he squealed and runner down the stars calling for his father almost tripping when he turned to enter the living room seeing his father sat on the couch "dad! dad!" he called as he stopped in front of his father. 

His father lowered his newspaper and placing it on the arm of the couch. He looked at the older of his two sons. He smiled at his son "yes roman?" he asked picking the little boy up and placing him on his right leg. His father pulled up his leave "look! there writing on my arm that I didn't write!" he called pointing to the light blue writing that now was joined by a black pen as well reading "hello Patton, I am Logan" Romans eyes widen as he reads the new writing "Roman, they're your soulmates" his father said taking his son's arm gently tracing the writing "and it looks like you have two of them" roman smiled "really!" he smiled. his father had said about how his soulmates would be like him and his mum where one day "so there my prince or princess!" his father laughter a little "yes roman, one day they will be your princes or princesses but you better reply to them soon" his father hands his a red pen from the table next to them. Roman smiled and ran off scribbling on his arm not caring if he banged into anything just that one day he could protect this logan and Patton as a good prince would.

** __________ **

Roman sat on logans bed fidgeting with the covers that were neatly laid under him. It was the first time he had met logan and Patton in person. He was nervous. Their parents had connected on Facebook and they had all agreed to take a vacation together in order for the three to meet when they all turned 13 as a kinda celebration. Roman had been the second to arrive at the hotel and had gone straight to Logan's room where they had all agreed to meet and Logan was just as Roman had imagined him. He was like your typical nerd, he was of Asian descent roman asked as well as going off his skin, he had jet black hair which was slicked back and very short and gorgeous deep black eyes which were very rear. Logan was also very tall Roman noted as the man stood around 6 foot tall may be slightly shorter. Roman had fallen for him harder when he first saw him. Roman had also learned that logan like himself had a few twitches caused by his mental state. He didn't ask much but from what he knew logan had been affected a lot by them and had hard times expressing emotions right and socialising with people but Roman and Patton didn't care and loved him anyway. 

Logan had warned them before they met about his condition but Patton and Roman had instantly said that they didn't care and after a lot of convincing Logan final got the message that they didn't care. 

Patton had shown up a few hours after Roman. When Roman first saw him Roman was taken back. Patton had such a soft touch on the door that Roman and Logan didn't really hear it. But when Logan had opened the door Patton had instantly hugged him, not understanding the concept of personal space really, Patton had dirty golden hair which was quite long compared to the other 2, Patton had ocean clear light blue eyes as well that Roman couldn't help but stare at in aw at how clear and prominent they were. he was quite short looking about 5'6 from Romans place being the shortest of the trio. 

After hugging Logan, Patton had looked to Roman and squicked running happily and hugging the taller man as well. they were all together final and they couldn't be happier, they thought that this would be there happily ever after, they would spend eternally together...

** __________ **

The keyword in that statement was thought... "where did this paint come from!"


	2. chapter 1: the paint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> at the age of 17, Virgil was studying art and photography at college. a girl was walking passed his easel and tripped over some spilt water with a paint pot. the paint spills all over Virgil marking his arms and arms since he had his sleeves rolled up. he uses to get the paint off his arms but it was too late, Patton, logan and roman had already seen the paint. however, they lived on opposite sides of the city and have never met.

Now 17 Virgil was in college doing a degree in art and photography as well as writing. he had always enjoyed the more creative part of school so he picked off the things he enjoyed. he was always careful to never get paint or pen on his skin as that would be a dead give away for his existence. but that couldn't last forever.

classes were always chill and Virgil had headphones in one ear listening to any instructions given through the other. he was painting one of the pictures off his phone for practice for painting a nude model next week in class. he had just about finished and stepped back when it happened. 

A girl who he had known for a few years had been walking past in order to get to one of the sinks and as Virgil had walked back she had tripped, whether it was on purpose or not he will never know, and watered down paint had gotten all over him... all over his hands and arms since he hadn't worn long sleeves... the girl got up quickly apologising over and over and although Virgil reassured that it was fine she just kept apologising. Virgil hadn't even noticed the pain on his skin in all the commotion.

Eventually, the girl stopped apologising after Virgil had grabbed her hands and made it clear that he wasn't mad or anything. He turned back to his artwork fixing a few things he had noticed, he sent a picture to the group chat of online friends which he had made a few years ago through gaming in the summer. They all said it looked perfect before one of them pointed out his arm saying that his soulmate must be painting too.

That's when the panic began... looked at his arm internally screaming at himself to not realising rushing over to the sink hoping and praying that they hadn't seen it. However, all hope was dashed when he read the light blue words under the paint _'hello? whos paint is this?'_ it was quickly washed off for some reason. But it was too late they new and that made Virgil breathing shallow, he started to feel his throat tighten as he found it hard to breathe. he started to take deep breaths curling upon him self remembering he was still in a classroom with people he didn't know or like particularly. 

**____________**

"where did this paint come from!" Patton said looking down at his arms. looking towards Romans living room where his two boyfriends where. They started spending summer at pone of there houses after they turned 15 as they didn't like being separated. they lived a few cities apart and mostly met at Romans house since he was in the middle of the two. But today Patton was baking cookies for the three after getting ingredients at the store. but when he was measuring everything out large amounts of paint had appeared on his skin. He turned to see his boyfriends watching a documentary, however. He walked over to them as they hadn't seemed to acknowledge the paint yet "g-guys, was this one of you" he asked in a timed voice holding up his arms which were covered in paint. both of the boys looked at each other then Patton "no? we have been watching a documentary the whole time whilst we where cuddling?" they both seamed as confused as he was.

Then Romans twin brother Remus stuck his head in the room "are you guys sure you don't have a forth soulmate and you haven't just blanket them for god knows how many years?" he asked looking over smirking at the three who looked horrified at the thought. Patton picked up a pen and wrote down something on his arm before anyone could stop him. but logan grabbed his arm "Patton! you need to rub that off your skin! If there is a forth then we need to not write right away and in this state of mind not to mention that your cooking." He said in quite a calm and calculated way but Patton and Roman could hear the fear and terror in his voice. Logan rushed Patton into the kitchen and over to the sink. But before they could wash the writing off the paint seamed to be washed off quite quickly and Patton had to quickly wash off the words. 

** ______________ **

It had been a couple of months since the paint and nothing else had happened. They had all started to question if it was real but one night Roman had had enough of ignoring the fact and ignored what Logan had said about waiting for them to reach out to them and started to write a small note to there forth in his red pen. 

_'Dear our forth,  
_

_why do you ignore us? I wished you had said something sooner, then maybe we wouldn't be here in this split between wanting to speak to you and not wanting to, do you hate us? have we done something wrong? what's so wrong with us that you don't want anything to do with us?'_

Roman felt hot tears falling down his cheaks as he re-read the note, he felt anger build-up when he didn't get a reply, it had been 4 hours now being 5 am. Roman couldn't sleep but Roman had gotten no reply from the mysterious forth... so he washed the note off sobbing realising just how ignored he felt. He just wanted all his soulmates together. He didn't feel whole anymore, when he had met the other 2 he felt like they were missing a piece of the puzzle that made them and now they understood why. Roman sobbed and sobbed realising just how hated he must be by there forth.

What he didn't know was logan had also seen the note and that had sparked some past feelings from all the bullying from his parents and former classmates. logan had started to sob as well. Staying up until he saw the note washed off. but Logan's mind had already started the dark hole which was doubt. 

They never spoke of the note again after that but they had allowed Patton to try and get there forths attention, even if it hurt them at the realisation every time they were brought up. Eventually, Roman had grown to resent there soulmate, hating them for all the pain in him and the hollow feeling in his heart. as well as that Roman had guessed Logan had seen the note after Logan defaulted back to his old ways back before they met at 13. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the summery may be slightly off and I'm sorry if it is, I don't often keep to plots I more use it as a guide but I hope you enjoyed the product.


	3. chapter 2: 'the mark on his face!'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> age 19:  
> roman was attending uni for acting, he sees Virgil and recognises the mark on his face from the one Patton had drawn on his face earlier in the day. Virgil had run off to fast for roman to pick up though before roman could say anything and roman never saw Virgil around campus again because he dropped out the next term to focus on work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gain this summery is a bais line, somethings may be changed slightly. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I have a few days to write so you may see a few chapters this week. I don't know how far ill get but hopefully, I can get at least 1 more out ~jj2003

Now 19, the three were in university living together in a dorm, they all studying different things.

Patton was in cooking class taking a masters in it now making all sorts of things and bringing them home for there boyfriends to share with him. The teachers had said he could go far in life with his natural skills and he pursued that and loved to bake goods and see people smile as they ate the treats he made. he wished to open his one bakery when he was older. 

Logan had gone for the other end of the spectrum, studying finance as his major but also astronomy as a minor alongside that. He had wished to study the stars but knew that just having that wouldn't be enough to support himself or his soulmates in the future so made it his minor instead. but he was happy to still with the subject he studied.

Lastly, there was Roman, he had chosen to do drama as he major knowing that if all else failed he could teach future actors and actresses in a local school or uni. he had always loved acting and had an obsession with becoming one day even though his parents planned to give him their company one day which would make it so only he had to work but he wanted to act in theatres and movies until then, so they agreed that roman could major in whatever he wanted but he had to minor in business to prepare himself. 

** _________ **

roman was the one to 'meet' him first. he had just left class being around 7 pm on a cold winter night walking back to his dorms listening to the songs from the play he was studying starting with heathers 'candy store'. he only had one headphone in though as he was looking out for the others. he heard footsteps suddenly and as he turned the corner he fell to the group "oh my god I'm so sorry!" the girl said trying to help him up "I'm so so sorry, I was looking for my-".

She cut herself off as she spotted something on the other side of the road. "storm!" She screamed over to the emo boy on the other side of the boy. Who looked overlooking quite scared if roman was honest. Roman quickly recognised the small mark on the man's cheek, even as small as it was Roman would never mistake Patton's little hearts on someone cheek. he had drawn one today as Roman had been upset in the morning in an attempt to cheer him up and hadn't rubbed it off yet. But before roman could say anything the two where gone... Roman hadn't even had a good look at them! He felt the familiar anger build in his chest as he started his walk back to home anger clearly written on his face. 

When he entered the dorm slamming the door behind him, which made his boyfriend jump, he screamed in frustration "how the hell are we gonna meet him if he's that fast" he turned to see Logan who was staring at his boyfriend in fear and pitty. Roman quickly called down "I'm so sorry love, I wasn't shouting at you," he said quickly running over dropping his bag and hugging Logan who had tears in his eyes and a hand covering his mouth. 

"I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean to trigger you" he hugged the taller harder trying to make the man feel something so he could start to calm down. "I'm sorry," Logan said still in his stat of fear "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" he repeated no breaking in his speech "please, I have done nothing wrong. don't hurt me, please" he begged as Roman tried to get his boyfriend back to reality. 

Eventually, Patton returned and helped Roman calm the fragile man down. "I'm so sorry Lo! I didn't think you would be home! I wasn't thinking" he kissed the man on the cheek, who was know straddling his lap' trying to show just how sorry he was. 

After a few minutes of this Patton finally asked the question the two were wondering "what had you so mad Ro?" he asked putting a hand on his red-haired boyfriend's shoulder. Roman looked up in shock "I met him! I recognised the mark on his face as one of yours and he disappeared before I could say anything!" he wanted to scream again but knowing it would bring up trauma for Logan he chose against the act instead he chose to make his voice lase with annoyance and anger hugging Logan making sure he did go back into the stat he was just in.

** ____________ **

However, after that outburst, the three never saw the man again even though they searched the whole campus for him. Virgil had dropped out after being offered a job by one of his friend's from high school which was good pay at a photograph shop which done portraits and photographs.

Virgil hadn't even seen Roman that night since his friend who was chasing him was the first thing he saw, running off after what they discovered something in their art which Virgil had done as a joke. it was a playfully chase with the two laughing at it later... but he never really spoke to those people again. the only people he really kept in contact where his online friends.


	4. chapter 3: he's gone!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> age 23:  
> Virgil has arranged to meet 2 of his online friends at a play that one of them is in. Virgil was sat in the middle of the theatre. on a coincidence, roman is also in this play and Patton and logan went to support him. they were looking around when Virgil had turned to talk to one of his online friends. Patton recognised the makeup on his face as the same as the one on there's since roman required to wear it due to his part in the play. Patton doesn't say anything as Virgil is a few rows in front and leaves it till after but loses Virgil in the crowd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all enjoy, I got a bit ahead in writing so hopefully, there will be more updates, also i know this is kind of like that last one but there is a point to this! in most soulmate au there is a 'pull' towards your soulmates and you meet eventually so this is my adaptation of that. ~jj2003

After the events, Roman fell into a deep hatred of his soulmate and himself. He hated how much he still wanted to love that selfish, cockalorum, pollock but he still did. Patton had assured him that what Roman felt was normal and that there had to be a reason. But Roman had been right in front of him if he had been better, stronger, more aware of the situation, more responsive! maybe, just maybe they would have there forth with them.

So Roman did the only thing he knew what to do. through himself into his acting career. with in the next three years, he had made a name for himself in there uni being top of the class, and when he graduated he got a role in a local theatre who had sought him out. he was frilled and the destruction took over his mind, shinning the shadowy event out of existence. but the thing with shadows is that you can never truly get rid of them, they always find a way to comeback overtaking the light.

** ___________ **

Patton was so excited to see Roman in the play. He was very supportive overall and it was nice destruction. he had helped Roman with his make up earlier that day since he needed to be quite pale in the play. the pain showed up on all there faces making them as white as ghosts. Patton just laughed as they found their seats talking to the people around them "yeah, my sister Abbi is in the play. Her friends are a few rows in front of us" the man said pointing to a small group of people sat on the end of a row three or four in front of where logan and Patton were sat. It consisted of three people, two guys and a girl.

The girl had bright blond hair which had dirty blond roots, nether Logan nor Patton could see there face. the guy to the left of the girl had short chocolate brown hair but the third boy gained most of Patton's attention. Logan only briefly looked at the group but Patton started feeling drawn to the man sat on the end seat. and when they turned around Patton could see why. The man had jet black hair like logans but the ends were dyed a royal purple. he had one green eye and one brown eye from what Patton could make out not really able to see. in sue you're wondering why Patton was looking at this man to find so many details... but it was because of the man's skin. it was white... and had the same texture that was on Logans and Patton's faces. 

Patton was going to jump us and confront the man but then the lights faded to black and the curtains where drawn... so Patton stayed put since he knew Roman would be upset if he saw Logan but not Patton there. the show continued. there was an intermission but as much as Patton wanted to confront the man he decided to wait till the end not wanted to be kicked out of he was wrong or if the man made a commotion. 

Near the end of the play, Patton turned to Logan and told him about the man who now had his hood over his head. Logan said he should have said something sooner so they could confront him but Patton knew he had made the right choice. Logan had also taken the realisation of Naver meeting there forth hard. Not as bad as Roman but bad. although Patton didn't know about the note from Roman he saw how the two changed the next morning and it tore the man's heart to shreds. 

But when the play had ended the man seamed to disappear alongside there friends and Patton suddenly saw why Logan suggested talking to them sooner not realising that they would leave that fast. they looked at each other and silently agreed that telling Roman may not be the grates idea after the last time... but Logan feeling only worsened. maybe if he was a bit more observant he would have seen the man as well and made the connection. 

** __________ **

"Jess?" Virgil asked the lady in front of him which stood at around 5'8. the lady turned to look at the shorter man smiling as she saw the facepaint that was plastered all over his face "wow, v your shorter then I thought you would be, what are you 5'5?" he nodded smiling at his friend "it's nice to finally meet in person v" the man next to her said smiling at him "I'm Leo if you haven't figured it out yet" they smiled. Virgil had been so excited to meet his three online friends. Abbi was in the play and they had all agreed to meet after the performance and go for food to get to know each other whilst also supporting their friend in this new achievement in life. surprisingly the fore had lived surprisingly close for the last 2 years since they all apparently studied in a close range at uni only being a half an hour drive from each other. 

Virgil enjoyed the show very much, when it ends he was one of the first out the doors though, he didn't like large crowds anyway but all the loud noises had spooked him. luckily they had said if this did happen that they would all meet up outside the theatre. and that's what happened. Virgil had met them outside and they had walked to a cafe not too far away and gotten some chips to share whilst they talked recalling things that had happened in the past, turns out the other three had known each other in real life for a few years now, and although this made Virgil anxious that he was a burden they reassured him that he wasn't and this just made their friendship stronger Jessica even saying that she will be moving across from him in the apartment complex he lived. 

all and all they had a great night, Virgil didn't even realise that the paint was washed off his face when they got to the cafe he was too happy to finally meet his friends. 


	5. chapter 4: I found our forth?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> logan met him next. he owned a local book store and was surprised when he was approached by an emo man looking for a book on astronomy. logan talked to him for a bit and writing appeared on the other cheek, logan felt writing appear to but didn't say anything thinking it was just a coincident. but when Virgil looked in the phone camera after Virgil left he was shocked to see what was on Virgil's check on his own. figuring out he was his last soulmate.

Logan smiled as he opened his little book store in there home town, the three had been quite fanatically stable since Romans parents were still giving him an allowance and had offered to buy the three anything they needed. At the age of 22, his parents had gifted them two small stores to do what they wished with. Patton got one and turned it into a bakery in the centre of town. it was booming with popularity. Logan had decided to take the other and turn it into a small book store to share the knowledge. Roman was proud of his two soulmates, at this point in life the three had almost forgotten about there forth, but there was always a small nag in the back of there minds that something or someone was missing. they still kept an eye out for them but there was never any sign of them... well not until they were 23.

It was an earlier morning in march when the event transpired. Logan was at the store putting out some books on astronomy. Patton was drawing on his face for an event at the café but they didn't mind at all. knowing that Patton was happy was all they cared about. They didn't really look at the drawing on their face but was curious as to what Patton had drawn on his face for there event today. 

There was a ring to alert Logan that someone had entered the store and soon enough a pale man with a pattern on his face and a black and purple hoodie was stood in front of him "excuse me? you wouldn't happen to know where books on astronomy book are?" Logan smiled looking at the man "we are all sold out of them I'm afraid, but if you like you can leave a phone number or email with your name and book you would like on the sheet and when the next shipment comes in next week you'll be alerted" Logan tightened his tie as the man nodded "yeah, that would be handy".

They made their way to the front of the store and he wrote his information down "its an interesting pattern you have on your face? did you draw it?" Logan asked. The man looked shocked "r-really? it must have been my soulmate, this happens a lot" he said rubbing his face a little in irritation "well it's very pretty, it looks like a rainbow with a puppy and kitten on it" Virgil's eyes shot wide looking at the other man "r-really?" he asked panic building in his chest as he saw something similar to the description on the mans face. He nodded "yes, it's very interesting" he smiled to the man "well, thanks, I'm sure he would appreciate that. I have to go through" and with that Virgil was out of the door in seconds panic building a little... _maybe it was a coincidence?_

Logan stood up and opened his phone interested now in what was on his own face.. maybe the man... Virgil's soulmate worked at his boyfriend's bakery. he smiled at the mark on bis face until he realised what it was... a rainbow with a puppy and kitten on it... w-was that there forth soulmate!

** __________ **

Logan walked through the door of there house and smiled the happiest he had been in a long while at his two soulmates who were curled up on the couch, Patton had washed off the mark on his face and he looked very peaceful on Romans lap. Logan put his hand on Romans shoulder as he walked behind him "I have some news to share, is Patton asleep?" he asked looking at the two and wishing that he didn't have to disturb there cuddle session. Roman nodded "is it urgent? I can wake him up if so?" Logan shook his head "I just want to tell you both together. I think it will make you both very happy" Roman nodded grabbing Logan's hand intertwining there's with his own "come join the cuddle love, I'm sure you have had a stressful day" he pulled Logan around the small couch and sat next to him tucking he head into the cock of his boyfriend's neck. Logan smiled leaning into the embrace fantasising about what it would be like with there forth there as well.

A few hours later Patton woke up kissing both his soulmates cheek "so, what's the news specks?" Roman asked pulling Patton father into his lap "well, I think iv just met our forth soulmate" he said. Hs boyfriends face lit up with vastly different emotions. He saw Patton's eyes light up like stars as a wide smile grew on his face like this was the greatest news in the world. however, Romans face... Romans face grew angry, it wasn't at the two in front of him but at there forth. he had felt abandoned by them for the last few years and all of a sudden they show up!? what gave this guy that right! their soulmates and himself had felt rejected for years and now he decides to show himself! he was ma, livid even at them. Logan did notice but he chose not to say anything yet. 

Logan turned to there smiling boyfriend "we may be able to figure it out next week, they left there number so the store could contact him when the book he wanted comes in" Logan smiled but Roman went red "is it even worth meeting them?" Roman asked looking down at his lap "would there even be a point. they haven't wanted to know us up to this point so why would they want to know?" Patton's smile faltered at that "its worth a try though Ro, right Lo?" Logan nodded

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u guys enjoyed this chapter ~jj2003


	6. chapter 5: meeting?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil had left his phone number so when they got the books back in stock logan could call and tell him. he tells roman and Patton about this and they all agreed when the book came in they would all confront Virgil. however, this doesn't turn out the way they wanted and Virgil runs off in a panic.
> 
> Virgil runs off and panics over all that they said to him, after a few hours there is a note on his arm, for the first time he looked at the note from logan. it was noted asking why he refused to talk to them, did he hate them? where they not good enough. Virgil didn't respond. however, when Patton called him he answered and agreed to meet only once and answer any questions but made them agree that at any point Virgil could leave and they wouldn't try and contact him again he did decide that. they agreed reluctantly.

Virgil received a call the early on in the next week. he was informed the book he wanted was back in stock. he said he would be around in the next few days to buy it. 

He didn't end up going to the shop until Thursday. He was greeted by a lady with bright red hair. He asked where the books were, she smiled gesturing to the right-hand side of the store "there in the back, just past the science section. The bookcases have stars on them" he nodded thanking the worker and walked in the direction she had gestured to.

He was not expecting the large section that was there, it had to be the largest section in the store, there were a few people there so Virgil pulled his hoodie over his head more. He walked over and started looking over the books.

He was looking for one in particular but it seemed to be popular as there where only a few left on the shelf. However, there was a man with bright hair that had a fair from a deep red to a bright red. He had chocolate brown eyes and his skin looked like he was of Spanish descent. Virgil hesitantly walked up to where he was stood "excuse me?" he said softly. The man turned to him and smiled "Hi, can I help you?" he smiled looking at the man up and down that made Virgil twitch slightly at the thought and memory of the last time someone did that. "I'm trying to get a book that's behind you, do you mind if I quickly grab it?" he asked timidly slightly curling up onto himself.

The man nodded, moving a few steps to the left, taking out a pen from his pocket. Virgil raised an eyebrow at that but bent down to get the book from the shelf when he felt the familiar tingling feeling on his right cheek. Virgil turns back to the man to thank him when he gasped "it is you!" he screeched in what Virgil could only describe as excitement. The man walked a few steps forwards until he was only a few inches from Virgil. Virgil felt his throat close up he took a few steps back in utter fear. He saw the man's face had a small mark where his face had just tingled and that made breathing harder as he came to the realisation of who was in front of him...

One of his soulmates... That guy from the other day must have not been a coincidence... He was ready to drop the book and run as soon as the man took another step towards him but to his surprise, the man stayed where he was writing something on his hand and for the first time in a long time, Virgil looked at the writing on his hand. There were two marks from the red pen the man had written and another from the dark blue pen 'put something on our face, I think it's him'. There was a reply in dark blue that read 'I'll be out the second you can confirm that Roman' then a reply that he read as 'Roman' wrote 'It's him! the marks on bis face...'.

Virgil didn't read the rest as he dropped the book and sprinted out the door, tears of fear running down his face as he realised what had just happened. He sat in an alleyway as he felt his head go light, he felt like if he stood up he would faint or fall right back down so he tucked himself away in a small space. He curled up on himself more he the thoughts came **'you disgrace! you looked at your arm! you looked at your arm! there dangerous! you'll get hurt just like her! she told you what would happen if you looked and YOU fell into there trap!'** the tears became heavier as he tucked his face into his knees "Virgil?"

** __________ **

Virgil sat on the light blue couch wrapped in a purple fluffy blanket that was converting. His panic hadn't failed completely but it had lessened. His friend came over and gave him the mug of hot chocolate with marshmallows and wiped cream handing one over to him and holding the other as she sat down. "Do you want to talk about it? or would you prefer to watch the nightmare before Christmas?" Virgil didn't want to speak at all so he held up two fingers to her, a code they had come up with the first time this happened a few years ago. 

She smiled and turned on the tv going for the classic right away before she pulled Virgil into a hug "I'll be here when you feel like talking about it, I'll be here always" he smiled at that cuddling up to the female.

**__________**

Virgil woke up smiling as he saw his friend was cuddling her soulmate, Leo, on the other end of the couch. He looked around to see that the sky was dark outside meaning it was probably late evening or earlier morning. He quickly picked up his phone checking the time

9:15 pm. It was quite late and he knew she wouldn't be mad if he left. He quickly picked up the few things he had on him and left crossing the hall to his own apartment. He opened the door and turned on the light sliding his jacket off and onto the chair in the dining area of the living room. 

He noticed that there was a lot of writing on his arm and he quickly saw there where two colours that made up the note. It started with black writing:

 _'Dear Virgil,_  
I'm sorry that Roman scared you today, that was not our intentions. He wasn't meant to say anything if it was you be he was quite excited and overwhelmed so he decided against the advice of me and Patton to talk to you. I was planning on telling you in a calm manner after you had bought that book (which ill have someone put away for you to pick up if you still wish to) we would like to still meet you of you would agree to it. I'm sure the others want to talk to you as well so ill leave it there.  
Logan Berry'

Then came the red writing:

_'Hey, this is Roman. I'm sorry for spooking to you earlier... I didn't mean to and I'm sorry that I did. I just wanted to get answers from you fast coz iv been in that dark about a lot of things swirling in my head and... I just need answers. It's driving me mad inside my head. iv tried to ignore the fact we had almost met in uni and that fact that especially after today you probably hate me. But I was hoping you would sit down with us and let us ask some questions at least. and become friends! Roman Prince.'_

Virgil didn't respond... He couldn't bring himself to! he hated the idea of writing on his arm... what if mum found out! shed have him! he would be alone... He started to cry at that walking to his room and hiding under the bed. 

**'You're already talking to them. she's going to hate you anyway!'**

Virgil started crying harder unill he fell asleep... What he didn't expect is to wake up to a phone call from a number he didn't know...

"Hello?" Virgil asked voice still dry and raspy from sleep. he was pulling at the strings on his ripped jeans he had fallen asleep in, in anticipation. He heard a soft voice answer him " _hello? Virgil?_ " Virgil hummed in recognition rubbing his eyes "whos this?" he asked looking at the number again in case he just didn't see the name, but it was still a number he didn't recognise so he held to phone back to his ears. The man seamed to giggle " _sorry kiddo, I forgot you wouldn't know who this is. its Patton. Logan mentioned me on your arm_ " Virgil didn't recognise those names off the top of his head until he heard the word 'arm' then he realised instantly who that was "and Logan gave you my number from the store logs" he started to get up and make he was into the living room yawning as he made his way to the couch " _yeah, sorry about contacting you this way but you didn't respond yesterday. We wanted to make sure you where fine and see if you where ok meeting up? to discuss something?_ " Virgil hummed again not fully awake yet.

They talked for a little while and Virgil agreed to meet up later in the next week. they wanted to ask questions... Questions Virgil's not ready to answer at all... maybe answers he doesn't even want to understand.


	7. Chapter 6: his voice ringing in my ears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they agreed to meet at a local coffee shop near to Virgil's apartment. when they meet Virgil is offish about being there, he seemed to put himself on the seat nearest to the door and was sat away from the table like he wasn't actually with the other 3. Virgil answered questions until roman started being hostile towards him and exclaiming that Virgil hated them. Virgil runs off after this saying that he couldn't say why but he didn't hate them before Patton could comfort him.

Virgil was sat in the far back corner of the little cafe a few doors down from his apartment. he had only agreed to the meeting as the had offered to meet here since there was an easy escape. he was waiting for the three to get here though he was 10 minutes early. He sat there texting his friends, them wishing him luck and saying if something goes wrong there doors were open where ever he ran. He smiled seeing Jessica's text saying that she would have a blanket cocoon set up for him in his living room. 

He puts his phone back in his pocket, ready to bolt at a moments notice. When he saw the red-haired figure in his peripheral vision enter the café. He didn't let his feeling bleed on to his face as the three sat down. he sat back a bit from them being cautious of the three practical stranger in front of him.

** __________ **

Patton smiled as he skipped down the street, ready to meet there forth. He felt the happiness he felt in years... They would finally be complete! when they got to the café, Roman opened the door and looked around. Seeing the guy sat in the far corner looking to the window situated on the left of the café. Roman starts to approach the man, the other following.

Patton stared in awe as he watched the guy put his phone in his pocket. Patton smiled taking the seat to the left of the man, Roman taking the one farthest from him and Logan taking the one to his right. they sat in silence until Logan spoke up. Roman didn't seem to be happy with what he was asking though "so, Virgil. How about we all introduce ourselves. Then you can tell us a little more about your self" he paused looking at Virgil, who subtly nodded, then to Patton who seamed very happy "oh, oh I wanna go first!" he said loudly practically jumping out of his seat. Logan nodded to him "its want to Patton, but you may go first" Roman nodded seeing his boyfriend so giddy smiling to hide the fear and anger he felt right at this moment. "I'm Patton Heart, I'm currently 23, I own a bakery or café near the centre of town called the pretty kitty" that got a smile out of Virgil.

"i-iv heard that your café very n-nice, my friend's goi- in there some times after work" Patton nodded seeing the nervousness in Virgil's eyes. Logan looked to Roman within those few seconds, only to see that what he was expecting to be Roman ready to introduce himself was replaced by some anger? Logan was confused but hearing Virgil talk made him see letting Roman go next may not be appropriate. So he decided to speak instead "I'm Logan, I am 24 and own that little book shop you came into the other day. I have to ask what made you want that book you picked up?" Logan was very curious on this anyway but he was also delaying Roman so Virgil would at least be a little comfortable. He could see how Virgil was ready to run at the slightest bit of danger. Roman needed to realise this before he had his turn to talk to him.

Virgil smiled "I was looking for inspiration for a piece a customer had asked for at my workplace. I work for an art company who take request and they get assigned to us and we get a time period to complete it" Logan nodded at that. Patton cut in before Roman or Logan could speak "wait! you're an artist!" he said quite loud again making Virgil shrink a little into his chair. But Virgil nodded regardless "y-yeah, I was going to u-uni for it but dropped out when I got a job in a friends c-company" Patton nodded. 

** __________ **

Roman, though eager to talk and get some answers, let the other two ask their questions and introduce them-self's. but soon his anger got the better of him when Logan gestured towards him "I guess, Roman here is to polite to but in" he said. all eyes where on Roman at that moment. he put on a smile "as Logan said, I'm Roman, I'm 23 as well and went to the same uni as you, we did sorta see each other once. your friend bumped into me and you ended up running away before I could speak to you" that made Virgil flinch and Logan glare at him. But Roman didn't really care... he wanted, no needed answers now! Virgil smiled at him "I guess that was a big coincident then, I only really left the dorm for school or I was going to a friends dorm" Roman nodded at that. he was angry, but he let Patton and Logan continue to question Virgil... just for a while but then he snapped at one thing Virgil said.

"I never really looked at the writing, didn't even think of it. That knowledge sent his blood boiling. He hadn't even looked at the writing! he hadn't even cared enough to look! 

**__________**

Virgil didn't even notice until he was sat in the comfort cocoon that Jessica had set up for him until later. Roman was livid at him... all because he hadn't written back... the voices of the former ringing in his head **"your so selfish you didn't even look at the writing?!"**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u guys like that chapter. i really enjoyed writing it. i have posted three chapter today due to the lack of updates. ~jj2003


	8. chapter 7: ROMAN!

Roman slammed the door open as Logan continued to list things he did wrong "could you not see how nervous he was Roman! He was ready to bolt the second we sat down and you only made him run by shouting at him!" logan stood in front of his creative boyfriend staring his deep in the eyes "do you even want to know him!?" Logan asked. Roman shrugged losing eye contact with Logan. Roman didn't get his answers still... Virgil had run off after Roman had shouted at him. 

Patton didn't get involved with the argument, he hated it when they argued but he was more focused on Virgil. He was worried for him, the boy had seemed so scared and when he just got IP and ran he looked as white as a ghost. it had been about an hour since then since they had walked there and the fact Logan and Roman where fighting had slowed them down. 

Patton had noticed Logan work pile on the cabinet and had an idea. he looked through until he found the sheet he was looking for. He smiled _**Virgil Black, 03-****-*******_ he smiled taking his phone out and walking into a room where he could nearly hear the two fighting. He typed the number into his phone and placed it to his ear. _Ring... Ring... Ring.........._

 _"He-hello?"_ Patton smiled "hey, Virgil?" he knew it was Virgil but the voice seamed harsh and gritty like he had been crying _"P-Patton?"_ his voice seemed panicked and sadness. Patton jumped at that "yeah, Virgil are you ok? have you been crying?" there was a mumble from the other side of the phone, then Virgil spoke clearly once again _"s-sorry about running off, m-my anxiety..."_ Patton felt guilty at that, of course, Roman had scared the poor boy, Patton sighted "it's fine, Roman shouldn't have shouted at you. I wanted to check on you. M-maybe we could try again" everything fell silent at that. 

_"I-I don't wa-want to burden you three with that"_ Virgil eventually said... Patton frowned at that"n-no Virgil, it isn't a burd-" he was cut off _"everything would have turned out that way anyway. I don't do good in crowds"_ it took a second for Patton to think of a solution for that... but then it hit him.

"What if it was just me? just one at a time? would that be better?" there was a hum from the other side of the phone

They talked a little more before Patton left that call. Patton was crying from Virgil's words... he thought he was burdening us? he walked out the door into the living room where his two boyfriends were still arguing "but he ignored us for years logan! don't you want anwe-" Patton cut the man off, "I think I may have fixed our problem," he said lowly 

__________

Virgil snuggled into the cocoon as he cried. he messed up... he had messed up so badly. he was a burden just like his parents had told him.

**They were right, your such a waste of space**

His sobbing increased as he curled up more. he hated this... why couldn't he have a happily ever after.

It took a while for Virgil to calm down. he wasn't thinking right still though and the exhaustion was getting to him, he started to drift off when his phone went off. When he saw who it was he jumped...

"M-mother?" he asked holding the phone to his ear, keeping his voice as steady as possible so he wouldn't have to explain. He must have done well or she just didn't care because she didn't make any comment towards it. " _Virgil! how nice it is to hear your voice_ " she said in a half sarcastic town. Virgil didn't comment on it, to upset to really think straight. he sighed "its nice to speak to you to mother" he hadn't gotten a call in months from the... They just want something " _well, Virgil. we need you to come home,_ " she said cutting the small talk like they always did. He sighed "I'm not coming home, I have a good stable job and am doing fine on my own mother," he said a slight hint of venom in his voice at the end. she must have picked up on that " _don't speak to me like that young man_ " she snapped which made Virgil flinch " _whats wrong with you boy! you could have such a lovely life here, what so good there? have you met your soulmates and have some stupid hope that they love you?_ " she started going on about all the things that were wrong with him and why his soulmates would be just like hers.

He ending the call with her saying that she would come to visit in the next month or two when she starts her leave from work due to her pregnancy.

He started to cry again, his mother had said a lot and the voice of Roman was ringing in his head louder and louder. He started to grip his hair with an ion grip. Somethings he said... somethings Virgil knew he thought... his mother names for him added in now.

**"your so selfish you didn't even look at the writing?!"**

**"worthless"** **  
**

**"Why do you hate us so much? why were you avoiding us?"**

**"Disappointment"**

**"your suck a decrease, I with logan had never found you"**

**"Mistake"**

Virgil didn't even notice when his phone started ringing until it broke through the voices.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, I hope ur all enjoying the festive season, I wanted to ask if people would like to see a Christmas chapter, if so what would in contain, I have about 3 ideas for what I could do, but I wanted to see If anyone wanted one, or would you prefer another chapter on Christmas eve? at the moment I am a few chapters ahead but some need to be fine-tuned before they come out. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! have a wonderful day or night ~jj2003


	9. chapter 8: the deal

Virgil sat in that same seat as he did a week ago, he had agreed to meet Patton and ONLY Patton. He felt easy when Patton entered and sat with him, the other two nowhere to be seen. He still wasn't comfortable, but he was more comfortable than when all three of them were around. he was ready for Patton to say they all never wanted to see them again. He seemed like the nicest out of the three of them and they must have realised how uncomfortable he was so they thought Patton would be the perfect person to tell him.

Virgil had expected this, they were so much better then him and the didn't deserve to be held back by him and all his issues. Patton sat down across the table from him and smiled "hey Virgil" he said with the happiest smile ever. he nodded in response but it made his stomach churn at the fact he knew what was to come next... "so, I wanted to ask about the other day" he said with a slightly sadder look on his face. Virgil nodded "s-sorry for running off l-like that," he said looking down at the table where he was fiddling with his thumbs "i-i just got overwhelmed with everything" Patton had a shocked and sad expression now "n-no, Virgil. you don't need to apologise for that! it was our fault for crowding you and roman..." he paused thinking of the right word to use... Roman had basically scared him by shouting but they didn't know that it would scare the shorter man. 

Virgil shook his head "it's fine, i-i should have been more prepared for it" Patton frowned... _was Virgil used to be shouted at?_... he took that emo mans hand "n-no, Virgil, you shouldn't have been, and Roman shouldn't have shouted at you. he was just in one of his moods" he nodded but it didn't seem sincere. Patton sighed "l-look, I wanted to know if... if we could try again... but slower this time" Virgil tensed at that... they wanted to try again?... "why?" he asked.

Patton's face changed completely "because we hurt you! we wanna make up for that and get to know you... even if it doesn't work and we just stay platonic its worth a chance just to know you" Virgil sighed... are they doing thing out of pitty? he was going to say he wouldn't but when he looked at Patton and saw the desperation in his eyes he flinched... how could he say no to a face like that? He nodded slowly "o-ok".

They agreed that they would meet up without the other two for now until Virgil got more comfortable with Patton...then they would move on to one of the other two...

**___________**

When Patton returned home he found that logan and Roman were once again arguing. Patton quickly stepped in-between them "guys come on! there isn't a point to arguing," he said putting his hands up separating the two even more. Roman spoke again tho "yes there is padre! Logan keeps saying that it's my fault!" he screamed trying to come closer to Logan but was stopped by Patton who had a stern look on his face. They had been throwing comments at each other sutterly since that day but they hadn't gotten into another fight... but they guess that was because Patton was there and neither wanted to upset the man. Patton knows that Roman would hurt them but it was scary seeing the man he loved so, so angry. they started to shout again, louder then before... but Patton snapped "GUYS!!" he screamed "that enough! we can't keep fighting like this!" he shouted gripping hard at his own hair, ready to pull out strands to prove how pissed he was. The other 2 stopped and looked to the shorter man... and they all collapsed. 

Somehow they realised that they needed to fix something else as well. Roman sighed "sorry" he simply said as he gently gripped Patton's hands to take them away from his head "i-I'm just so, annoyed and angry at the years of ignoring us," he thought back to the letter years ago. That's when Logan saw it... the tears that laced Romans eyes. he sighed and sat on the couch, head in his hands thinking back to the argument, the note... and Virgil. 

Patton let everything calm before telling them, and they were happy but annoyed that it may take a while for them to all know Virgil. The one on ones would only consist of Patton for a few weeks and would only last an hour or two. They all agreed that even if it all became platonic... getting to know Virgil was worth it, the feeling of knowing him was drawing, and they needed this to feel whole again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all enjoyed. there are about 3 chapters left to post and the epilogue after that. I hope you all enjoyed and there will be another chapter out today probably in a couple of minutes since iv finished the next one as well in a writeing mood I was in the other day. hope you all enjoyed ~jj2003


	10. chapter 9: What have you done?

Virgil sat silently in the little cafe again. he had agreed to meet his next soulmate: Logan. Patton had said that Roman wanted to meet him as well but after the last interaction with the flamed haired man, he wasn't sure if that was a wise idea. Roman had triggered so many bad memories that day of his parents. Virgil was still surprised they hadn't decided that he wasn't worth it. _'your such a burden'_ he heard his mother's voice say to him _'if only we never had you!'_ he didn't want to turn out like them at all. He never wanted to burden them since he knew how Patton was and sure Roman was angry at him but that was his own fault for not communicating with them for so long. He wished that they had never found him. They would have been happier then they were now.

He was waiting for Logan to get here so they could introduce himself under better circumstances. He had opened tumbler on his phone so his mind had another place to wonder though he knew he would be on it all night. Virgil and Patton had been meeting up for a month at this point but Virgil was still very wary of him. Patton seemed nice but he couldn't trust anyone. well, maybe he could trust some people but not them... not his soulmates!

Virgil feels a hand on his shoulder and he jumps looking around to see Patton stood there with a worried look on his face jumping as well "sorry kiddo, didn't mean to startle you" he said quietly. Virgil let out a breath "it's fine Patton, I just wasn't expecting it" he looked behind Patton to see logan stood there with a small frown on his face. Virgil nodded towards him as a greeting. Logan jumped a little at that but returned the gesture "its a pleasure to see you again Virgil" he said as him and Patton sat down at the table. Virgil wasn't as far back as he was on there first to encounter Logan noticed. Logan didn't say anything though instead, he decided to give Virgil your space. They had a pleasant conversation about random things having a few debates over topics. Logan didn't bring up Roman fearing that would scare about your off. When it was time for Logan to leave Virgil felt a bit more comfortable around them not enough to be comfortable enough to let them know everything but more comfortable than their first encounter.

The meetings carried on throughout the next month. Virgil was happy to get to know the other two however he still feared the day you would have to meet Roman... And that day came sooner than expected.

Virgil had arranged to meet Logan in a small park not far from the other three's house. He sat with headphones on listening to Panic! at the Disco. He was aware of his surroundings but let the music overtake his brain a little. He was so into his music he didn't realise the man approached him.

When I shadow covered him he looked up I need to see Roman looming over him. He jumped making a startling noise leaning back onto the bench he was sat on. Roman quickly raised his hands in the defence.

" Sorry I didn't mean to startle you, I just wanted to apologise for our last encounter and I still you over here," he said in a calm voice not learning his hands. Virgil didn't move out of fear Roman may strike him. Between the two encounters, his mind had made a mental link between Roman and the things that his parents used to do when he would look at it soul marks.

Roman took a step back feeling how uncomfortable but was. He sighed " I really am sorry I didn't mean to shout at you I was just so frustrated at the fact it took 23 years for us to find you and yet you still don't want to be of us-" he tightens the grip on his hands that one now at his sides "- I just don't understand soulmates are meant to be a great thing something that everyone wants. I just don't understand why out of everyone we got paired with you if you don't want us!" He was getting visibly angry now and Virgil can say that. Virgil's breathing started to become heavier and it looks like he couldn't control it. Roman step back again fearing that he had done the same thing he did before and that the other two would be disappointed in him. Suddenly there was a cry from behind him "ROMAN!" He turned to see Logan does their arms crossed glaring at Roman. He walked towards the pair " what do you think you're doing? We all agreed that it wouldn't be a good idea for you to see Virgil at the moment" he was walking towards the shorter of the two when Roman snapped.

" I can't take it any more I want answers Logan I want to know why he's been ignoring us why he didn't respond to us for so many years" Virgil started to shake in fear. He was breathing heavier change take more air in. The shaking got worse and worse as Logan and Roman began to argue over him. He didn't want to be the reason they fell apart he didn't even want to be with him at the moment because he was still afraid. In the end, Virgil ended up running once again. And he didn't stop until he got home. He leaned against his door hands gripping his hair in a tight grip as he whimpered and shook and felt the words appearing on his arm.

' _Virgil I'm sorry please come back_ ' he dared to look this time. But he still didn't respond and said he picked up his phone with his shaking hands and dialled the number.

**__________**

" it's going to be alright," Jessica said as she hugged Virgil to her side. He was crying and whimpering and shaking and he didn't stop he was so upset he lost his soulmates because he had actually formed a connection with two of them. They couldn't get the fear of Roman out of his head. He didn't respond to the note and he just sat there taking in the comfort of his friend.

However, the piece was too disturbed when a knock rang through the room. Virgil got up and open the door warily.

"Mom? Dad?"

"Virgil sweetie, there's my grown-up boy," his mothers sweet yet sickening voice said. His father didn't say anything he just did there a look at content on his face. Virgil took a step back inviting them in. He wasn't expecting them until later this week but he let them, men, anyway. They all stood in the living room Jessica sat in the kitchen letting them have a private talk but not too far away that if Virgil got distressed that she couldn't jump in and help him.

And his parents cut the ball crap and went straight to the point "we want you to come home with us Virgil"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all enjoyed. I love the Clift Hanner I left this on (even though I know what going to happen) will Virgil go back? or will he stay for Logan, Patton and Roman? I hope you enjoyed this chapter! ~jj2003


	11. chapter 10:come home

Patton had been the one to come up with the idea. They had decided to go and see Virgil and to get Roman to apologise once again for scaring the poor man. They were currently walking towards Virgil's home which Patton knew where it was located as Virgil had a once invited him over when they had become comfortable with him.

They are tried to call the email man but they didn't get a response. Logan hypothesised that Virgil might have blocked them in order to feel more secure. But they were worried. The way Roman had scared Virgil you're off and the mannerism showed gave Logan a bad feeling.

So here they were now stood outside Virgil's flat. But they heard shouting from inside. They could make out three voices but could only recognise one. Virgil's voice " I'm not coming home and that's final!" They had the man cool in his rough monotone voice.

They didn't knock at that they were more worried and concerned now. So Raymond decided to kick in the door. For them stood four people. Virgil, The woman Patton recognised from when he originally saw Virgil, and two older looking people which they had never seen before. All four of them seems to turn and silence as they saw the three of them.

" Who are you?" The older woman cried. Virgil seems to tense at the sight of the three but he remains silent bare clear in his eyes. Romans spoke first before the other two could assess the situation " his soulmates, Who are you?" He said bluntly. The woman's face seems to grow read at what Roman had just said. She turned towards Virgil " is this why I want you to stay? Because you met your soulmate? They're only going to hurt you" she screamed in an angry and dominant voice. The woman that Patton recognised and was stood in front of Virgil spoke next " what does it matter he doesn't want to go back, he has a life here and he doesn't need to go back to be your babysitter" she seem to go red as well as she made sure Virgil was behind her. The two began to argue back and forth and now I could really make out what that they were saying. But Logan gathered on what the argument was about. And quickly jumped in the argument shutting it down quickly.

The two didn't seem to agree with what was going on and started to take drastic measures.

" for the last time, I'm not leaving with you. If that's what you're hiding but on the other reason you're here then LEAVE!" Virgil's voice rang up in the room. It went silent his parents in shock his friend more concerned and the other three seemed out of place there they didn't know the full story and they didn't know what was going on. Virgil glared at the two older people "I said leave" he repeated.

Raven gripped the man's shoulder " didn't you hear him he said to leave" and we all guessed the man didn't enjoy that.

"ROMAN!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, i'll be posting the last 3 chapters tonight as I feel like having a fresh start in the new year, I may change a few things later or improve chapters I'm unhappy with ut i hope you enjoy and have a happy new year ~jj2003


	12. chapter 11: maybe... just maybe

After that the two left, screaming insults at there son, Logan went to see the damage to roman as Jessica called an ambulance. Virgil was currently freaking out, Patton doing his best to convince him that it wasn't his fault and to not listen to his parents. But Virgil kept blaming himself. If he had left earlier with them or agreed in the first place then they wouldn't have been in harm's way. Even if a little voice was saying that even if they had left that the three would have followed him. 

**'you suck a disappointment!'** his mother words before she left rang in his ears. they had given Roman a nasty cut on his head which was leaking blood. Virgil could help but blame himself. His mother was right on that fact he was a disappointment, he had let his soulmate get hurt because he didn't want to go home. Roman was right to hate him

When the ambulance arrived to take Roman he was out cold. "come with us v, please!" Patton begged holding out a hand for Virgil. He shook his head tearing up again. he could go with them and be alone! he just couldn't "Virgil, please come with us," Logan said walking towards the pair as the ambulance went with Roman since they were taking their car to the hospital. Virgil didn't want to go, he knew that Roman wouldn't appreciate his presence once he woke up. He would be so angry.

"Virgil, I'm sure Roman would appreciate you being there when he woke up," Logan said from behind. He shook his head "I very much sought that" he mumbled, Patton's face dropped... Roman had been the most enthusiastic about Virgil and if Virgil was there when he woke up he would really appreciate that. but before he could say anything Logan cut him off "I understand your concerns due to Roman previous interactions with you, but be assured that he would very much like to see you when he woke up, out of all of us I feel like Roman is at his happiest when he met you and would very much appreciate that." he stated in a matter of fact tone. 

Virgil realised that he wasn't going to be able to stay here without an argument. he nods "ok" he mumbled just loud enough so they could hear. Patton jumped with joy at the agreement and Logan smiled. 

** __________ **

When they arrive they are told to stay in the main waiting room. Virgil sat a seat away from the other two still not wanting to be there, Roman doesn't even like him, he shouldn't be here. He had his hands in his hair with a tight grip. panic building in his chest, his breathing slowing and becoming harsher as he felt a-

Virgil jumped out of his seat when a hand landed on his shoulder "Virgil, we are all happy your here, and I'm sure Roman will be happy when he wakes up to see you" Logan said holding out a hand for him. Virgil still felt the panic building, faster at the words Logan had just said. He was trying to conceal it to his two soulmates.. apparently, he wasn't doing a good job. His breathing got harsher and before he realised what was going on the two had closed the gap between them. Patton was in front of him on his knees and logan was in the seat next to him. Patton spoke first "kiddo, do you mind if I touch you?" he said. Virgil shook his head "Patton, maybe move away he could feel blocked into his seat" logan said leaning away, Patton also moved back enough so Virgil had space to move if he needed "Virgil can you follow what I say?" he asked, which got a small nod from the younger side "breath in for 4" Logan tapped the metal of the seat handle for four and Virgil tried to follow"hold for seven" he tapped for another seven as Virgil's breathing became a tiny bit more steady. "and out for 8" he tapped for another 8. Logan continued to do this until Virgil's breathing came back to a more normal level"

Virgil turned to the former "thank you" he said as he wiped his eyes which he hadn't noticed was wet until now. Logan nodded moving slightly closer "I'm guessing you have an anxiety disorder?" he asked Virgil shrugged "probably" was all Virgil said. Patton moved closer "do you mind if I hug you now kiddo?" Virgil looked to Patton, seeing the pain and sorrow in his eyes. Virgil gave a soft nod. Patton moved closer to Virgil and wrapped his arms around the former. 

__________

It took a few hours but eventually, they heard about Roman. He had been knocked out by the impact of the men hit with the bill hook that Virgil's father had smacked him over the head with and there was a cut from that but there would be no damage to the brain. He would be kept for a few days in order to make sure he was fine. They told the three that they were fine to go sit in Romans room but he wasn't up and he may not be for a few hours. Virgil insisted on staying in the waiting room. He didn't want to be in the room... After a few backs and forth comments and agreements, they agreed that Virgil could stay in the waiting room but clarified that once Roman was up they would come to get him when Roman said they could if that what was worrying him. He agreed since he didn't want to keep the three apart any longer and watched as the two left. 

However, it didn't take long for him to panic. He sat there with thoughts going through his head... and they wouldn't leave him alone. So Virgil left the waiting room and the hospital but didn't go far, intending to call Jessica and ask her.

 _'beep...beep...beep... "hello?"_ Virgil's breathing caught _"Virgil? are you there?"_ Virgil took a deep breath "y-yeah, I'm here. I'm sorry for calling but I needed to speak to someone" he heard a sigh from the other side _"its fine V, what's up?"_ she asked her voice calm. Virgil took a deep breath pushing down the lump and panic in his through "I-I can't d-do it. I'm sorry.... I'm just so scared, I can't g-go s-s-see him in there. it-its all my fault" he could feel the tears straining down his face " _V it's not your fault in any way. Remember how I took it when my soulmate rejected me?"_ he made a soft confirming sound which they knew to mean yes _"remember what I said to you?"_ she asked. He made the nice again "y-yes, you s-said that you wished that you a-at least got a c-cha-chance with t-them... to b-be with t-them... to l-lo-love them" he wiped his eyes as more fell sniffing.

"Yeah, I did, didn't I" she took a deep breath "what if they want the same, do you remember how bad I got after that?" he thought back to the day Jess had told him about her soulmate. He had rejected her because of her school status at the time. she had gained a lot of popularity the next year and he tried to get her to date him, but she rejected him because he didn't love or care for her but just her status. 

"Do you want Roman to go through that feeling?" that made Virgil freeze... Jess had been so isolated to everyone for a few weeks, next thing they knew she was in the hospital because of her mental state. He hadn't been able to visit her bet he video chatted every day reassuring her. She grew from that. But it wasn't the result for everyone... "no... I don't" he simply said. He heard his friend smile and giggle "you care about them V, I don't think it's going to be like them. Even if it does for some reason, ill always be here for you" Virgil wiped the tears that were falling down his cheeks "thank you" was all he could say in between sobs. His friend hums "if things turn south, I'm here for you to call" he hummed in agreement "you should probably go back in" she said in a happier voice. Virgil hummed in agreement before ending the call.

__________

Virgil had arrived back in the waiting room teary-eyed only to get tackle hugged by Patton. Virgil gasped when he was almost thrust to the ground by the impact. He managed to keep standing with his hands up before realising it was Patton. He also saw Logan approaching them "Romans awake. He wants to see you, Virgil" Logan looked at the two with love in his eyes "Patton," he said rubbing the area under his glasses. But before Patton could pull away Virgil hugged him back. This made Patton smile "ok" was all he said. Patton squealed pulling Virgil to Romans room. 

Maybe giving these three a chance wouldn't be that bad...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last chapter before the epilogue! I hope you all enjoyed my story! I had such a good time righting and thinking up this story and thank you to everyone who has been here since the first instalment and even before that before I decided to re-write this au! ill be writing another story soon hopefully if not my one-shots will continue to be updated and I may even make a one-shot for this story! for now, after the epilogue, this story will be done and again I hope you all enjoyed and thanks to my friends who helped me write the first few chapters and the plot! ~jj2003
> 
> hope to see you all in another story!


	13. epilogue: we can find love

After Virgil was lead to Romans room they talked... just talked for hours. Virgil explained his fears... why he never spoke to them or replyed, why he ran away... They all understood but in the end, they agreed to go slow... as slow as Virgil needed in order for him to feel comfortable with the three. That was there deal, and they stuck to it through thick and thin. 

They went on a lot of dates after that, mostly planed by Roman, and they all grew closer from them. After a year of these dates, Virgil moved in with the three. They all loved each other very much. Everything turned out fine.

"Virgil?" Patton asked walking into the house after a long day at work looking at the man asleep on there couch smiling. he giggled walking over taking off his shoes and placing them in the shoe rack "shhhhhh" Patton heard turning to see Roman in the kitchen making something "he's asleep pat, let's not wake our emo nightmare" he said walking over to the man "how was your day?" he asked quietly in almost a whisper gripping Patton's waist kissing his forehead. "Patton giggled again quieter "it was fine, just the usual at the shop"

Virgil did eventually wake up when Logan returned and the other two had disappeared. "salutations Virgil" Logan said stifling a laugh, walking over and giving Virgil a quick kiss on the lips. They both smiled "hey Lo, how was work" he asked whipping his eyes hoping to wake up more. he had fallen asleep since he didn't have work today but everyone else did having so much alone time he chose to paint before falling asleep on the couch trying to catch up with Jessica on avatar the last air bender so she couldn't spoil it anymore like she was prone to doing. 

Logan smiled "it was good, no major stories to tell you Love. where are Roman and Patton? they should have been home by now," he asked no really expecting his boyfriend to know just having an external thought. Virgil shrugged "probably together somewhere. knowing those two there probably causing a fuss over something," he said smiling. Logan laughed sitting next to Virgil giving the darker male a kiss on the cheek. "probably" he said before wrapping an arm around the man "how about we watch something?" Virgil nodded laying his head on Logan's shoulder.

__________

Surprisingly the two managed to fall asleep by the time roman and Patton had returned from there adventure. They both pouted at the fact they missed the emo nightmare walking up. They both sat next to the pair whispering as to not wake the two up knowing that they both probably needed it, with Virgil going back to college (thanks to Romans mums assistance that he did) and Logan having meetings about his shop all day. 

The two did wake up eventually when Patton was making a late dinner and Roman was writing things down for his next performance about his character. 

Virgil knew he mad eth right chose with them... and he never regretted it...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading this story, I hope you enjoyed this! ~jj2003


End file.
